I stopped writing on my multiply account a couple of months ago because I was afraid I was just busy being naggy and cheesy. Actually, I was being naggy and cheesy. I just didn't want to admit it before. But it came to a halt when I reread my entries. Oh gods, I loved drama. I think I still have the tendency to write a drama on my blog (or multiply or whatever) but somehow I managed to implant a sense of shame in my head.
So, following the recent emotional breakdown, which I managed to write in form of a cold prose (hopefully it looked like that), I still haven't got the energy to write about anything interesting other than my dying heart (oh please...). I started doing the 30-day-movie challenge, which proudly to say, has not gone more than one entry. I'm lazy that way. But at least writing about movies that I have watched made me feel slightly better. You know, I prefer to write something entertaining that teary. I find it annoying now. I have been doing it for so many years, it just has to stop.
A friend used to say that it's always easier for him to write when he was sad or upset or distraught, compared to when he's happy or contend. He thought he expressed sadness better than happiness in writing. I used to think that way, until recently... until I felt sick to the guts reading my own writings. Now I have problems expressing sadness and happiness. Great. It's easier to talk about something general, like what I'm doing at the moment: the difficulty of expressing one's feelings (in case you haven't figured the whole purpose of this writing up until now).
It's in my head, I know. I mean no one will actually point a finger at me and tell me that I'm a crybaby because I always curhat---tearing my own heart---on my blog. People just have to stop reading and move along. Simple, like caking a bake *grin*.
The main thing about writing is, whether it's a blog entry or an article for a newspaper, you need to invest time, so you will produce a magnum opus (yea right). And writing things which are not related to how sad or dramatic you are is pretty hard, man. I think I have said it before... I'm an emotional writer: I write about emotions :D
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